Francis Berger
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In The Event of a Zombie Apocalypse

9/5/2021

5 Comments

 
This is one of the more amusing - or disturbing - oddities I have recently come across.

Amazon's service terms contains a clause that directly refers to a zombie apocalypse. I get the sense some wag lawyer wedged this into the terms as a joke, but considering what corporations have become in the past decade or two, who knows?  (Bold added; see original service terms here): 

42.10. Acceptable Use; Safety-Critical Systems. Your use of the Lumberyard Materials must comply with the AWS Acceptable Use Policy. The Lumberyard Materials are not intended for use with life-critical or safety-critical systems, such as use in operation of medical equipment, automated transportation systems, autonomous vehicles, aircraft or air traffic control, nuclear facilities, manned spacecraft, or military use in connection with live combat. However, this restriction will not apply in the event of the occurrence (certified by the United States Centers for Disease Control or successor body) of a widespread viral infection transmitted via bites or contact with bodily fluids that causes human corpses to reanimate and seek to consume living human flesh, blood, brain or nerve tissue and is likely to result in the fall of organized civilization.
5 Comments
William James Tychonievich link
9/5/2021 11:59:55

Proving a point about how nobody actually reads the terms of service?

Reply
Hari Seldon
9/5/2021 18:37:12

This may be a reference to the CDC's "Zombie Preparedness" page, which deals with emergency preparedness in a tongue-in-cheek fashion suitable for a public that understands reality through the lens of pop culture: https://www.cdc.gov/cpr/zombie/index.htm

Did I say tongue-in-cheek? At least, I hope it is.

Reply
Francis Berger
9/5/2021 18:54:49

@ Hari - Remarkable. So, the Amazon thing seems to be little more than an extended joke via the CDC.

I can't help but feel this is ironic in a very meaningful way.

Reply
William James Tychonievich link
9/5/2021 20:51:09

All that work, and now the zombies are here and no one was prepared.

Reply
Jana Gatien
9/8/2021 17:49:45

I do wonder if their joke is literal. A demon needs a human to take physical form (aka possession). Maybe this series of pecks is terraforming/calibrating the human to to be a vessel for demons. From what I understand, at the supernatural root of the System, we will find demons and demons require human sacrifice for fuel, like a car needs gasoline. This isn't new info. It's mentioned all over the Bible. I'd say "human trafficking" is the more palatable cover term for this age-old sacrifice network. But what if this supply of human flesh & blood has been impeded? Cut off or greatly reduced? Would they not get hungry? Would they come out? Would they lose their advantage of not-being-seen? I see major sloppiness, stupidity & desperation in system operators right now. The System is NOT doing well at all. At the same time, I'm seeing people at the grocery store just blankly staring at a soup can for minutes and way more car accidents on straight roads with no weather extremes at all. Every time my husband comes home from town, he's shaking his head that the people are acting like...zombies. dumb drivers, dumb pedestrians, dumb shoppers, dumb cyclists. Like, noticeably dumber than a year ago. Of course, I question, are they really dumber? But I'll trust my gut on this one. There is a noticeable impairment...

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