Francis Berger
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Spell Check Is Not Always Your Friend

2/18/2020

7 Comments

 
I don't often reflect back upon my high school teaching days in the Bronx, but as I was sitting on the train to work this morning, I inexplicably recalled an inadvertently funny essay a student had handed in - a two-page written report on ancient humans I had assigned for a grade nine world history class.

For the task, I had given my students a list of ancient humans - Homo naledi, Homo floresiensis, Homo neanderthalensis, and so forth - and I asked them to choose one, do the necessary research, and write a report of their findings. I insisted the report be typed, and advised students to proofread and spell check their work before submitting it.

A week later, I began marking the submitted essays. About halfway through the pile of stapled papers, I came across a rather perplexing essay title: The History of Homoerotic Man. Intrigued and bemused, I flipped past the cover page and confronted the following introduction (as best as I can remember, minus the original spelling and grammar errors): 

Fossil findings say homoerotic man lived in Africa one or two million years ago. He probably lived in Africa because it was hot. Since it was hot, homoerotic man did not wear clothes, only some animal furs here and there. Homoerotic means upright, so homoerotic man was one of the first to get erect and stay erect. He was also one of the first to walk on two feet. Walking on two feet meant homoerotic could really get around. Homoerotic man liked to hunt and gather berries. He sometimes did this with other homoerotic men. Homoerotic man was also one of the first ancient humans to use tools on a regular basis. Most of his tools were used for hunting, but archeologists think homoerotic man used some of his tools for other things too . . . 

Yes, I'm sure he did. 

After I recovered from the laughter that had consumed me, I took a moment to consider what had led to this most unfortunate, yet hilarious, history essay. It didn't take me long to figure it out. The kid had spell checked his work as I had instructed him to do, but instead of carefully analyzing the suggestions spell check had made, the student had thoughtlessly agreed to everything by clicking the correct all button.  

Word's spell check program had not recognized "Homo erectus man" (I think the kid crammed the terms Upright man and Homo erectus together to come up with that) as a valid term and had suggested homoerotic man as an alternative; and as far as my student was concerned, that was A-okay.

The rest is history. 
7 Comments
William James Tychonievich link
2/19/2020 11:11:26

A colleague once visited my house and was perusing the titles on my bookcase when she said, "Wow, you have a lot of gay books, don't you?" I was a little taken aback by that but then realized that she had been looking at the Nietzsche section of my library, where The Gay Science was filed right next to Ecce Homo.

"No, no, it's Nietzsche," I said, showing her the portrait on one of the covers.

"Oh," she said. "You're right. No gay man would ever grow a mustache like *that*!"

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Francis Berger
2/19/2020 11:33:58

@ Wm - That's funny. I wonder if she would have thought the same had her eyes landed on D.H Lawrence's The Rainbow or Charles Darwin's The Descent of Man, and Selection in Relation to Sex, to say nothing of more risque titles like Shakespeare's Titus Andronicus or Herman Melville's Moby Dick.

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William James Tychonievich link
2/19/2020 19:05:48

I used to have some fun with the way I arranged my books -- putting "What Is Life?" (Schrodinger) next to "A Season in Hell" (Rimbaud), or a children's book called "Opossums" next to Michael Denton's "The Pinnacle of Life." I almost bought David Foster Wallace's "The Pale King" for no other reason than so I could file it together with "The Red Queen," "The Black Prince," and "The Green Knight." I was once lectured very earnestly by a black roommate's white friend about the inappropriateness of putting "The Souls of Black Folk" next to "The Soul of the White Ant."

Craig Davis
2/19/2020 13:26:49

Funny stuff! Thanks for the laughs.

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Francis Berger
2/19/2020 14:38:54

Thanks, Craig. I think it's good to lighten things up once in a while.

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steph link
2/23/2020 08:25:36

Haha, that passage was hilarious though. Poor kid does not even know what happened here. I have been in embarrassing situations myself because of the spell-checker on the phone.

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Francis Berger
2/23/2020 20:45:57

@ steph - Thanks for the comment. Yes, I believe we have all been victims of this sort of thing to some degree or other. I make some fairly funny mistakes on this blog from time to time.

The other day, a reader and penfriend informed me I was using the wrong form of 'case in point' on my blog posts. He was right! I had written "case and point" on at least a half-dozen posts.

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