Readers of this blog probably know I have an extremely low opinion of the European Union, but I fully support and endorse one thing the EU has done - the eradication of daylight savings time. Last week, EU lawmakers, bless their little demonic minds, passed legislation to effectively stick a fork into the perplexing and idiotic habit of changing the clock twice a year. As of 2021, member states within the EU will have the opportunity to opt out of daylight savings time altogether, putting an end to the unnerving biannual time travel missions. Thankfully, it appears Hungary is on board, which means when I wake up in the spring of 2021, I will permanently return to being my true age after having become magically one hour younger over the course of an autumn night six months earlier.
This is likely the only time I shall ever express the sentiment I am about to express (so you might want to bookmark this page as it may gather historical significance over time), but it would be ignoble of me to not give credit where credit is due. Thusly, I congratulate the legislators at the EU - the vast majority of whom I consider evil incarnate - for passing the one good piece of legislation their poisoned little souls have ever drafted. It just goes to show, even the murky depths of evil are sometimes capable of good.
In any event, now that the EU has passed the only beneficial legislation it will ever generate, it has my full permission to collapse with all the destructive glory of an imploding star (or, more appropriately, a collapsing circle of yellow stars). After that, more good will have the opportunity to rush in and fill the vacuum the EU's Babylonian maliciousness will likely leave in its wake.
Note: Studies have shown the daylight savings time change increases the risk of heart attacks in men by 10%. I am planning to go for a 10 kilometer jog after I finish writing this blog post. If you don't hear from me tomorrow, it will be because I probably became one of these daylight savings time heart attack statistics.
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